長大成人 when allie left h (第1/8頁)
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辛迪·卡恩·舍洪
SandiKahnShehon
MydaughterAllieisleavingforcollegeinaweek。Herroomisclutteredwithshoingbagsfilledwithblankets,towels,jeans,sweaters。
Shewonttalkaboutgoing。
Isay,“Imgoingtomissyou。”andshegivesmeoneofherlooksandleavestheroom。AnothertimeIsay,inavoicesofriendlyitsurrisesevenme:“Doyouthinkyoulltakeyourostersandictureswithyou,orwillyougetnewonesatcollege?”
Sheanswers,hervoicefilledwithannoyance,“HowshouldIknow?”
Mydaughterisoffwithfriendsmostofthetime。YesterdaywasthelastdayshedhaveuntilChristmaswithherfriendKatharine,whomshesknownsincekindergarten。Soon,itwillbeherlastdaywithSarah,Claire,Heather……andthenitwillbeherlastdaywithme。
MyfriendKarentoldme,“TheAugustbeforeIleftforcollege,Iscreamedatmymotherthewholemonth。Bereared。”
Istandinthekitchen,watchingAlliemakeaglassoficedtea。Herface,oncesooenandtrusting,isclosedtome。Istruggletothinkofsomethingtosaytoher,somethingmeaningfulandwarm。IwanthertoknowImexcitedaboutthecollegeshehaschosen,thatIknowtheadventureofherlifeisjuststartingandthatIamroudofher。ButthelookonherfaceissomadthatIthinkshemightslugmeifIoenmymouth。
Onenight-afteralongeriodofsilencebetweenus-IaskedwhatImighthavedoneorsaidtomakeherangrywithme。Shesighedandsaid,“Mom,youhaventdoneanything。Itsfine。”Itisfine-justdistant。